This quote right here could be the synopsis. To the point that it actually became the theme of the story more than the supposed real plot of the book. The constant word vomit and worshipping of his holy-fuck-is-that-a-real-penis was OVERDONE. You think I'm exaggerating, don't you? I wish I was. I swear by all that is holy if this chick mentioned the size of this man's impossibly monstrous,vagina exploding, porn star sized, uncut cock less than once every paragraph, I would be amazed. She was supposed to be potty-mouthed, blunt and bold. She had too many glaring character flaws that killed the story for me. She has to be one of the worst I've ever read. I can't ever remember a heroine annoying me this badly. And after their one night stand, has to win the heroine over. What especially attracted me was the fact that the hero was a star hockey player whose manwhore reputation is completely unfounded. I'm on a little reading kick with this genre and this book seemed cute, so I decided to give it a shot. What drew me into reading this book was simply the sports romance theme. Hell? I want to remove that image from my brain. I couldn't be more ready if I jumped into a pool of lube. His voice is hot and sweet and hard a Werther's Original sitting on a radiator.Īnd if it wasn't one of these food gems, the writing went a little something like this: He spends a few minutes loving them like they're deluxe cheeseburgers after a night of binge drinking. It's not like he'll be able to fit more boob into his mouth. His voice travels over my skin like marshmallows drenched in hot chocolate syrup. Like gummy bears left out in the sun, I melt right into him. I ask you: what is remotely sexy about ANY of this from their first hook up? And a "What is this?" feeling in the back of my mind that never really went away.Ĭase in point: what in the ever loving hell is up with the first sex scene? We're constantly bombarded with food similes. From page one, I had a permanent eye squint and nose crinkle in frustration and/or confusion. But for me, I DID NOT connect with the writing style of this author whatsoever (this is my first read by her).
I can see where some people may find this book cute and quirky if this type of humor is your thing. I'm not one to gleefully let loose on a book and tear it apart, but there are times when I feel so frustrated with the time spent on reading something, it's almost impossible to hold it in. On the other hand, I'm attempting to reign in my stabby feelings out of respect for the review copy I was gifted. On one hand, I have a deep urge to rant over this book and let my annoyance rip. Well folks, I'm grappling with two conflicting urges.
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